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ACT 2: PART 14

They disconnected. What? Why?

Back to Chris and Shelly, ‘cause we’ve always got to be at the action yo. Always. All of the ways. ALL OF THEM. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Seriously, though. To Shelly.

Shelly is impatiently waiting for Chris to build up her house. The imp armada had all been decapitated or defenestrated. Through her second story window. Into a huge pit that she couldn’t see the bottom of. She considers for a moment that that may have been overkill then shakes her head and laughs in derision. No such thing as overkill. She goes up to the little platform that Chris had made when she entered, and deftly backhands an imp hiding behind the door with her club. Blood sprays everywhere, and she frowns and looks at her clothes. Aw darn, they had been ruined by imp blood. She takes a mental note to kill a whole bunch of them in retaliation later. A little to the right, there is a spiral staircase ascending skyward to the clover gate. She shrugs and starts to head up, then looks at the Totem Lathe and Alchemiter. She wonders for a second if she could make something else with it, then resolves to experiment later, a voice she mistakes as her subconscious telling her to continue up the stairs and find more enemies to kill.

Okay, she’s getting a little… scary. It’s almost like her personality has inverted. Or someone crazy and  bloodthirsty is controlling her. Even us authors are getting scared. Let’s head out to another person in our merry party. Amir, the newest guy who is currently entering. Or will enter. Or has entered. Who the hell knows with all the time shenanigans. I mean, seriously. We’re just being rude at this point with all of them.

Amir is sitting on his bed, when suddenly an odd, long machine with clamps on sticks appears in the longer section of his room. He gets a message from his server player, whose, he learns, name is Tammy.

tM: Amir.

aA: Tammy

tM: I just placed down something called a Totem Lathe in your bedroom. I think we have to get some stuff from a different thing in this thing.

aA: What?

tM: Must I be more specific?

aA: I think that might be helpful, yes.

tM: I believe we have to get some cruxite dowel from the Cruxtruder in this Phernalia Registry.

aA: I can do that

aA: Where is the Cruxtruder

Amir hears an incredibly loud sound of something very heavy being dropped from a high point. He runs downstairs to the source of the noise, and he finds that Tammy had dropped what appeared to be the Cruxtruder onto his deck, crushing and splintering the wooden planks and digging a hole into the ground, wedging itself within the dirt. He sighs and opens the door to the frigid air that was outside on the 19th of December.

aA: So I imagine I just twist this wheel to open it?

tM: yupyup

aA: I can do that.

Amir takes grip of the wheel on the Cruxtruder, and starts pulling hard. He manages to get it almost one and a half ways around, but can’t quite get the rest, as it gets really pressurized and sealed all of a sudden.

aA: Can you get the rest of this done

aA: That is all I can do right now.

tM: Of course.

The wheel suddenly turns very quickly and what Amir is going to learn what to call a kernelsprite flies out.

tM: Ignore that for a moment, we’re focusing on the cruxite.

aA: Alright

He pulls the cruxite dowel out of the Cruxtruder. Amir examines the cruxite. It’s a very dark navy blue and very… light, for some reason. He then goes back to talking with Tammy.

tM: Now put that in the Totem Lathe’s clamps.

aA: Ok

Amir does so, and then realizes there’s a slot for some sort of slip. Playing card? He takes out his card deck and puts in the two of spades. It does nothing. The slot was probably way too large. It was, in fact. He asks Tammy for something to fit in the slot, if there’s anything available.

aA: I need something to put in the slot

tM: There’s something in here called a prepunched card. I think this is what we use to carve your cruxite dowel.

aA: Give it to me.

Suddenly, a blue-edged card falls out of his ceiling and lands in his open hands. He slides it into the slot, and a laser beam comes out of a small hatch on the side of the clamps and starts shaving the dowel into a totem.


aA: Alright, now what?

tM: I believe that we put it on a… crap.

aA: Crap? Why would we put it on a piece of crap?

tM: I’m sorry, I meant crap as in the exclamation. Must we get into semantics?

aA: I’d honestly rather not

tM: Good, I’m an English major and I would freaking murder you with words.

aA: Let’s not have that.

tM: Anyways, I believe we put it on an Alchemiter, which I forgot to deploy earlier.

tM: You seem to have enough space in your living room, I’ll deploy it there.

Another loud crash as the Alchemiter plunks itself down on the floor of his living room. He runs down and places the Cruxite Dowel on a little totem-sized platform on the side. For some reason, on the larger platform, there is a-

Screw it; we can’t be finishing this act off quite yet! We have things to do! Intrigue! Death! Rings! Falling bookcases! Wait, what? Seriously though, even though we’d love to introduce more characters and confuse the lot of you more, we’ve decided to continue on with no one but the characters we’ve been given. For now. Mwahahahaha! 

Back to Chris. He had set up camp in front of his window and was building an awesome spiral staircase in Shelly’s house. He had searched for the way to build it online, and was now just copying and pasting parts of the architecture on top. He isn’t an architect, however, and has no clue that his unsupported staircase is very unstable.

He stops at the first gate, and checks out of the window, aiming with the scope of his rifle. He was mainly picking off imps on the other platforms, as none were coming towards him. He takes aim at one that looks suspiciously like a Spartan, and fires. The bullet rips through it, the imp exploding into grist almost immediately. Suddenly, something flashes brightly next to him. He shades his eyes and looks at it. It seems to be a ladder, about his height, with rungs with names. The one at the very bottom is flashing. He bends down and looks at it.

“Welcome to the 21st Century,” He reads aloud. He shrugs, and guesses that it is some sort of leveling system for the game. Apparently, he had just gained his first level. He wonders what his class is briefly then goes back to killing imps, the holographic ladder disappearing before he could notice the boondollars he had gotten.